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The Daily Sporfle

Have you ruined your keyboard today?

The Daily Sporfler
Have you ever seen anything like this?

I don't own these characters, so please don't souse me.

Or this?

"Why are you scared of my beauty?" Harry asked.

Or even this?

-I just wanted to help- said Harry apolitically.

If so, chances are you've visited Fanfiction.net.
I collected the above gems, and more, laughing myself sick along the way, until my bio was so full it took forever to scroll down to my stories. (I maintain that's why nobody ever read them.) In the fullness of time, it became apparent that my collection needed a new place to call its own. And so was born daily_sporfle.
Oh, it's been done before, I know, but the sad fact is there's so much fantastic material on Fanfiction.net going to waste, with nobody to sporfle at it, that I feel I'm justified.
So, the premise is: there's a new Harry Potter quote every day, until Fanfiction.net runs out of suitable candidates (an unlikely occurence). If you have something that you feel needs to be shared with the world, please email and let me know!

Bad spelling is up for grabs, as are grammatical errors, innovative punctuation, anything that inspires the question "WTF?", and quotes that just strike me as being generally hysterical. Note that the idea is not to make anybody feel bad: I acknowledge that even the best of writers has off moments (and some of the funniest bloopers come from Spellcheck). And I'm not intentionally seeking out authors with a less than perfect command of a second language (though I'm not above laughing at a particularly good error, either). Some of the best writers I've read have English as a second language (re the fantastic Ekwy) and you all know the kind of thing native speakers can produce (re approximately half the alumni of The Pit of Voles). I'm inclined to think that some of the spork-related journals go a bit far with the hatred, actually; I'm not trying to crush anybody's dreams, and I certainly don't want authors to die or stop writing, because then where would I get the funny?

However, to paraphrase many other sites - pottersues and deleterius to start with - please don't throw a hissy-fit or quote copyright at me if I've found your work amusing, because if you publish something on the Internet, I can sporfle at it.


And if you like what we do here, here are some more sites you may enjoy:

They Who Record Badfic:
The original HP bad-quotes journal. (No, we didn't intentionally copy Babb, although we're ready and willing to acknowledge the genius behind it!) Semi-weekly, published on Fridays.
Die Chroniken des Schreckens. Bad-quotes in German, and the reason why I won't attempt to write any fic in that language, as it would certainly be a candidate.
Your weekly weird Star Wars fic quotes digest. (Have fixed the dead link. Sorry about that!)
Evil Lesbian Overlord, and chronicler of Mary-Sues. Check out her FAQ for more info on this particular quirk of badfic.
Chronicle your own Sues! There are plenty to go round...
For all your fandom news.

The scarier (although very, very amusing) recesses of fanfiction:
One-Stop evil shopping for 50 years, situated at Knockturn Alley. Daily Sporfle now gets a 5% discount. Hehehe.
The Harry Potter Fanon Cliché Community
A community for silly or serious fanart, fanfiction, discussion, icons, etc, about genderbent Harry Potter characters.

A work in progress is the 95% Sporfle-Free Authors page: we're collecting good writers too, although they're thin on the ground. As always, if you've any ideas, mail us! (And yes, we accept self-plugs, although the final decision rests with the Sporflers. Bwahahaha.)

Looking for a particular Sporfle? A handy guide to the tagging system can be found here.

100 days troll-free, anti-establishment poetry, author's notes, bad writing, badfic, badquotes, beta reading, canon, characterisation, commenting, comments, constructive criticism, crossovers, darco malfloy, dumbledor, fanfic, fanfiction.net, fanon, faux-japanese characters, funny sex scenes, good writing, goodfic, grammar, harry potter, hermoine, hot topic, hp canon, improbable pairings, insane plot twists, keyboard wreckage, magic sticks, mary sues, mistakes, quotes, research, reviews, spellcheck mishaps, spellchecking, spelling, stage-irishness, stop the madness, taco shows, temporary uteruses, the maruaders, tortuous grammar, train-wreck writing, trollfree, typos, unexplained mpreg, unintentional hilarity